Day 241 | Pele Yoeitz - Why Parents Should Not Hit Children
Hey Chaver, welcome back. Today is Sunday. We continue our Pelayoit journey, day 241, and we are beginning a new topic called Hakah, which you could translate as corporal punishment or maybe more simply as hitting. So we're gonna learn about hitting today, and we'll probably see that it's not the best. Mo it's not the best thing. Okay. Someone who hits his older son is liable for excommunication. But according to the reason, you know, it's not just talking about a child who's older, Sher Hatam who Lifia Shagan with Noshia Baitbo be Matto Avi Vinim Taveral with Nebuchadnezzar. The whole reason why it's not good to hit an older child and that so much so a person will be punished is because the child's not gonna listen. He's not gonna feel that admonishment. He's not gonna, it's not gonna do anything for him. So that same reason would and not only that, but it's gonna be just a stumbling block for him because he's just gonna go and continue doing his thing. So that same reason can apply not just for Abu Noah Gadl, but someone who's younger too. He naked lo goddl goddamn shall feel cut on kosh, debo shining kabo mars, even a child, even somebody who's younger, going by darzala in our generation, the chutzpah yaste, where people, it's prevalent to have chutzpah, um and a father, uh sorry, and a son uh like goes after the the father, ala filo and gaiar babekas, but but and the father how does he deal with this? How does he deal with this disrespect? He can yell, he can admonish, he can deal with anger, but guess what? The son, the child doesn't genuinely listen when it's done out of anger, vet mes omru techas gara, bemevin mea goes k seal mea, right? Adam and admonition frightens a discerning individual more than a hundred blows to a fool. Apostle can mishleigh. Bemevin Amru. So Aval sorry, Bemevin Amru. This is talking about somebody who's an actually like intellectual. He's a he's a discerning type of person, he understands things. Ava Mishno Mehvin Kabulgara, but somebody who's not discerning, he's not going to accept this admonition, this chastisement. There's certain children who they just don't listen to their parents. And the parents have to recognize that these children they're challenging. They don't have fear of God. They just don't listen to their parents. The parents should not command that these children serve them in a particular way. What should the parents do? They should apply tremendous effort not to get angry at them. But to speak to them calmly and soft. You're not going to be able to do this all the time, right? I think I'm writing this for human beings, right? Shloikha of English Apic Matabas ben named Shum Daba Libhos Alambuhham. The child's gonna be disrespectful. He's a difficult, challenging child. The parents they're going to lose their cool. Of course. It pains them so much seeing the child doing something against what they want, something that's not proper. I'll call Panam Shibi Khum Lazas Yasu Vikha Rabinto. It's okay, you're human, you're going to mess up, you're gonna yell sometimes, you're gonna hit sometimes, you're gonna be a little rough sometimes. But do what you can in each moment, try to be calm, try to speak softly, try as much as you can to the best of your abilities, that's what is in your power to do and to capitalize on that. What does that every parent want to do? They want to clear, they want to purify the soul of their kids. That they that the kids should now serve their maker, the creator, but what should we do when the generation is not they're not gracious, they're not they're not going, they're they're they're not doing good things. And the children would ever they don't want to do the entire mitzvah. They're not ma'amship of the mitzvah that you're doing. However, says the player, sometimes they'll go, the child will go to so sometimes they'll go um to our tisral or to um a cemetery as yomrun and they'll say, meetingly of the aim of Allah Kabasar Glam, who shall give me a father and a mother that I might lick the bottoms of their feet, um, to lift them up, carry them and serve them with all my strength. However, if they want Hashem to then consider it as if they performed all of these things, then they they should that let them do it right now, right? So the meaning that the the kids should take some level of resumed stability when they can. Hello. And then a Qurish Baruch is going to do this amazing thing, right? When you try, when you put your foot bet best foot forward, a Shems fills it. Even if you don't end up completing it, Hashem quote unquote completes it for you. Right, it's it's not so common to find children that listen to their parents, right? Do you listen to your parents? No, see? She says no. Right, we find that daughter-in-laws argue with their mother-in-laws. Wait, you actually don't listen? Or you do? No? I think you do. Right, in this generation, where it's so hard to find the um this type of right, where it it's hard, we live in a generation where there's chutzpahsyaske, there's so much um chutzpah, ma'am, laveim, sloy, smokem, right? He's saying that there's a myla of sending the kids away, not to kick someone out of the house, but when there's a little bit of separation, it can create again, obviously when kids are older, but send them to Yeshiva, seminary, something like that, that separation can actually create um some type of closeness. Like uh Rabbi Nachman talks about his rachakus, distance is like the beginning of his carvas, it's the beginning of closeness. So there's a there's an element that to think about, like what this means. And it's good for the kids to come to this volition on their own kiya eder to be able to do that. Right, it's which very important to have, it's very important um to uh uh to pay attention to this and to try to be machabid your parents as much as you can. And it's gonna benefit you in this world and the next. And then when you bear you when you um honor your parents, then you're you'll be honored by your own children at the right time, and um you'll be rewarded in this world. And the next we'll continue this uh section of Hakab hitting Mirz Hashem tomorrow, wishing you a fantastic rest of your day.
