Give Unsolicited Advice to Your Friend | Pele Yoetz | Hachzek Day 55
Alright, Chavro, we are back. Pelio, it's day 55. Today is exciting. We're finishing the topic of Chavrusa, uh friendship, and let's see what Ruveli Yezer Papo has to teach us about friends. Don't worry, I'm gonna translate. When it comes to making rulings, judgments, paskaning la halacha, a person has to have a certain level of fear of rendering halachic decisions. He shouldn't make rulings alone, yahidi, um, because otherwise it can lead to mistakes and he doesn't want to get a splinter uh from the beam. Vihimu bamakam Shayn Roshim, he's in a place where there's nobody else who yeah at me, he should be a good friend himself, that makes vitaditon, muster day to his for us. So he should go through all of the different parts of the sukya, vihtalab call kaikilur, trefal atmapih bihoso. He should see himself in a way where he kind of says, Oh, I'm a trefa. Um he says, I'm chayy, umitach kahib. He's going through this um this rhetoric, I guess, in in his head, basically trying to get closer and closer to the emas, to the to the truth. Not where he's bashing himself in like a negative way, but he's trying to be mevarer um and seek out the truth. So too, when it comes to engagement in Torah, Kushibolo, isa kushio territory. When a person has a question or an answer, Shinir Bainovtai mod, he thinks it's a very good one. He should try to maybe push it off. Through this internal debate back and forth, the truth will hopefully as the shem be clarified. It's best for a person to have a God-fearing that you could speak to, you could talk to, and you'll um become closer to each other and to the rebonous seino vik no lano. This is our obligation, and this is what's best for us. Havullachem isa eit so he der Hisha to provide at advice. A person should provide counsel, provide advice. The things that are the should be able to meaning part of a good friendship is to give advice, even if it might be unsolicited. I was just at a VART actually the other day. I was wishing Malustaf to the Khass and Ma'ustaf very good. I saw the brother, I was wishing him a give your brother advice. He's like, if he doesn't ask me, I'm not gonna give him advice. I don't give unsolicited advice. So truth is, a person who's really a good friend, he he does give unsolicited advice, right? Again, he's to know, but if he really taka is a good friend, he might say something if he thinks it will be beneficial for the friendship for the person who who's hopefully willing to listen. We have to strengthen each other um to serve a kurushbruk. Umnam Ain Ava Vicharus ala biddaim people love each other, they have friendship for those who are like-minded or similar, they have certain things that they find in common, right? That's how friendships usually start. Shavm Bemidos of Deus, they're they have similar qualities. Then they dwell together and they don't separate. However, this is difficult to find. Look through your phone context, whatever. Like, wow, Taka, this is a great friend. Like, cherish that. If you have a good friend, hold him tight, don't let him go. Maybe gaula kokin't having a good friend brings the gaula. Fascinating concept to think about more. On the flip side, an evil friend does the opposite. Shabilti Abshir Shal Yomad, Minawishlo, Yasik Meso. It's impossible to not be with somebody and not to learn from them. You're gonna be influenced. Maybe you'll be saved by not speaking bad by from you know speaking badly, not so Mishmira, but you're gonna hear something bad. It's gonna harm you in some way, not so miasra, a person can lead to transgressing the tire. And uh hopefully that shouldn't happen. Um, but we don't want the young man to bear the anguish and society. Every person needs to stand on guard, Albanov, La Frida, mechavimrab, to ensure that his children are separated from friends that are not good for him, his that are bad influence. Uloh shivim bainbirke tamichamim to place them amongst those who are the Torah scholars, ki Ishraim Lisraya, man is a social being who makes friends, those who go to the sages will become wise. Says the Belieites, if you don't get friend, go seek counsel with your rabbits and with your wife. Comush Matsino B Rabi Lazar, Nasi, like we find by the story of Rabila Z bin Azari. Tells us, Itzach Gutzah Gechain, Ulachesh, La, if your wife is short, bend down and listen to her words. She has what to offer you. Don't forget that. She's your friend, the wife of your covenant. We'll continue with letter chas, a new topic, the topic of Chaim, the topic of life. Merzushem, we'll see you all tomorrow.
