How to Be a Good Host and Guest | Pele Yoetz | Hachzek Day 70
Hey everybody, hope you're doing fantastic. Today is day 7070 Pelioitz, continuing the section, the topic of kindness. Khazid, let's jump right in and move along. Uhlal Gamilas Hasadim Hi Hamitza Rabbah Shalaknosis Archim. Part and parcel of the mitzah of kindness is to host Shigidalamia, K Bala Sbinay Shina, it's even greater than receiving the shina. Vashkam is based on medrishan, it's even greater than waking up early to go to the house of study, Kumush Amur Bashas, like it says. It's true. Hosting people is not an easy task, especially if the people you're hosting, it includes a lot of children, etc., and they're gonna make a mess. It takes a lot of work, effort, not just physical but mental. Shemisrabah, Habilbulva, Yoshim, Young Young Rama, Metosa Bayas Murubah, right? Let's say they stay a long time. Even if they don't, you're you're you as the host, you're you're spending a lot of money, right? It's a lot, it's a big tier god. And the yitzahar knows how precious this mitzvah of Achnas Archim is, so he tries to do everything he can to say, no, don't do it. He tries to stress you out to wit's end. But a person who's a thinking individual, somebody who's actually on the right path, he's gonna realize that my reward for doing this far is far outweighs the loss. And if I'm gonna do it, and I'm going to do it, I'm gonna apply with great effort, and it will be um to my creator, Sheikh Das Kharab, and my reward will be increased. Truth is, man was born for this. Man was born not to just chill and relax and twiddle his thumbs. Although, if you want to twiddle your thumbs, go for it. But man was born to work hard, as shisha mulaburatera, mitzvah lyotzra. Godl be sham to nifter beshem to praiseworthy somebody who applies himself in this world. And he leaves with uh a good name. Part of this mitzvah is really connected back to something that we've already said before, and that goes back to loving your friend like yourself. She slabbes Khavera, each who wrote se what would you want to do? If you what how would you want to be treated if you were in that situation? Think about how you would want to be hosted. Think about the times you were hosted, and those put a little basket with like a towel, a face towel, and a water bottle, and like that extra touch. So now the next time you host you do that. You do that thing that that you would want to be done to yourself. It's an important idea. So Palaeot was just discussing the importance of hosting. Now he's discussing from the perspective of the actual guest. Says the Palaeot, it's an obligation upon the actual guest not to be a nuke become a nuisance overbearing on his host. It needs forethought. Person has to understand the position he's in, he has to go to the the end to the thought process. How is my host thinking right now? Right? If you end up staying in the house for three years, it may something might be off, something might be wrong, right? Like you have to know how to be a guest. Vishla says, Dove or neg returno, don't do anything against the host's wishes. If you know that he's makped, that you take off your shoes, take off your shoes when you enter the home. True is we talked about this in the section of Dereh Herz. A guest has to understand. Hey, is this host, does he really mean it? Does he really want to host me? Or is he really miserly and stingy? If that's the case, if the guy says, eat and drink, but you know that his heart is not really with him and he in and he doesn't really want you to be there, run away. Run away. Don't stay at this person's help help, otherwise you'll be in the realm of ghazaleah, of theft. Says the Zire that better for a person to strangle himself than to partake of the bread of a stingy person. When a person is the guest in someone's home, he shouldn't stay for too long. Truth is, he should help out. If he has the means to do so, he should help out with expenditures, with money for the host. That way it's not so much of a burden. Uh, that's obviously if the host will be ashamed if the guy you know participates in terms of of money, so then you shouldn't. But you have to, that's what you have to go to the soif diet. You have to understand what the host really want. We just read that, you have to contribute with the expenses. VM E Fsher, Yesha, VMEF Sher, you shalom to vrcho, right? Um, if you can't do it and you're not able to actually spend money, so then at least properly thank the host and give him blessings for his hospitality. Kemoshit nervous, like Khazal have taught us. Birkis are shivarchabala byes, birch is a mozim, but there's an actual um insert uh part of uh tfila that we insert in the benching that a guest is thanking and giving great blessings to his host. So say that. Right? There's so many things that we can do to express our honor and ex and and bestow blessings upon those who are hosting us. The Shas is replete with different examples where the the Rav will begin his drausha with kvail a khsanya, with thanking the host and giving bestowing upon him great honor. But so that a person should recognize how great their portion is and how pleasant is their love. Rav Toyba Tovan Laham Bizavaba, right? When you bestow blessings upon your host, you're you're putting them in the right frame of mind. You're showing them, hey, what you're doing right now is good. Keep doing that thing, keep hosting, because you're receiving a tremendous amount of reward, not just here, but in the next world as well, uh as well, at Jekabalosum Bis Simcha B saypanam Yatvos. And because you are encouraging the host, and because you are giving them blessings, they will host more and they'll do it with simcha, they'll do it with a smile, vieka, they nehterehva tell of your fatova, and any inconvenience that's involved in hosting, it's going to there's that's not going to stop them from actually hosting because they're going to realize the abundant reward that's that's awaiting for them. Sometimes it happens to be that a person will have to be a guest in someone's house for an extended period of time. But don't be pained by this. These are part of the wonders of Hashem. Both the host and the guests, they are both serving Hashem, they're both doing as well. This is what the king has established, and whatever it is a person is doing, you could be the host, you could be the guest. A person has an obligation to fulfill their role as best as they can. Wishing you all the best, have a wonderful rest of your day, and Mr. Sham, I look forward to learning with you tomorrow.
